Tuesday, March 27, 2012

My TFA Speech before Jim helped me to revise it...(This speech was never spoken :P )


Hi, my name is Lara H and I am from here in Rapid City. I graduated from Rapid City Christian High School and then attended college at South Dakota School of Mines and Technology. I love South Dakota. My family is here. My future is here. I love the land, and I love the people. For a short period of my life, from when I was eight until I was 14, I lived in the Bay Area of California, and that time gave me a great appreciation for the way that people here have time for and are interested in each other’s lives. However, as I grew older, I began to notice some things that made me ask questions. Why, when I was riding the bike path, were there often older, native men sleeping under the bridges? Why did I hear people making racist jokes about Natives Americans? Why did people that I respected talk about Native Americans in a mostly depreciating way? What was it about this group that caused them to be so different?

As I sought out these answers I realized that I couldn’t judge a whole group of people based on the few that I had encountered. In fact, I didn’t really notice a native person unless they were doing something that I found to be out of “the norm.” During college, as my awareness of native issues increased, I began to realize that there truly was a disparity between my quality of life and the quality of life of many Native American people. I didn’t take any classes that were informative of Native American issues, but I did live in a part of town with a high density of Native American residents. The struggles that many of my neighboring families faced daily was evident and disturbing. Although I never wanted for anything when I was under my parents roof, during college I realized from first hand experience how having little money can be a cyclic issue, even if you are careful with your spending. Thankfully I knew that I would soon be getting my degree and moving beyond minimum wage jobs. That is when I realized that one extremely significant difference between me and my neighbors was that I was soon going to be educated, thus allowing me to move out of the neighborhood and have a job that could more than pay for my bills.

When I realized this, my heart went out to the native people that I had seen living hard lives. I knew that I wanted to change things, to just make it all better, but that is not how life works. By chance, or by fate, the chair of the mathematics department at SDSM&T mentioned Teach For America to me during the September of my senior year. After looking at their website, I realized that I didn’t have to be alone in my efforts to provide a means to increased quality of life for these people that I didn’t know, but had come to have compassion, not pity, for. After joining Teach For America and moving out to Mission, on the Rosebud Sioux Indian Reservation, I came to know these people, the Sicangu Lakota, on a deeper level. My student’s families have invited me to their participate in their sacred traditions such as inipis, they have taken me horse back riding, and they have fed me dinner.

Being in the classroom as a teacher was at first a new experience for me. I was a teaching assistant for college algebra while I was at the School of Mines, but teaching college students and teaching freshmen in high school are two different things completely! For the first time in my life I was enforcing rules rather than following them, and I was solely responsible for the development of the bright young minds in my room. It was challenging to figure out when misbehaviors were due to a child feeling overwhelmed or underwhelmed by the rigor of the material, if they just had a ton of energy, or if they had had a rough time the night before. My classroom first semester had many different skill levels, from children who could scarcely subtract to children who could already combine like terms. Attendance was also a big struggle. At any given time about 1/3 of my class might be missing, and thus very bright kids were not learning the material because they were not in the classroom.

These struggles were a bit overwhelming at first, but after talking to my administrators, the special education department, and other Teach For America alums, I was able to work out a system that works for both my students and for me. To manage behavior, I made my expectations of classroom behavior very clear in my own mind and to my students. This allowed me to be consistent when dolling out discipline and allowed them to feel consequences were just and expected. To deal with the various ability levels, I began having upper level students work with medium level students and medium level students help lower level students. Also, everyday I have an extension activity for students who finish their assignments early and want to do more. To help prevent chronically absent students from falling too far behind, I used some advice from TFA alums who also work at my school and created a system that makes it simple for students to find the work they missed. At first I was bitter about the “extra” work that my chronically absent students created for me, but I soon realized that the things my kids face are so much greater and harder than the things I faced in high school. I now have compassion for them and am impressed by their desire to work hard and catch up when they return from school. Everyday I have 2-3 students stay until 5:30 to either practice their algebra or calculus, or to catch up on work they have missed. In fact, just realizing that my students were excited to show me how much they could do was revolutionary for me. I realized that if I bring my excitement and passion for math into the classroom, then my students can’t help but join in the joy with me.

I have one student in particular who stands out to me. He came into my pre-algebra class first semester as a sweet and innocent freshman. He worked hard and sought out my praise. He often asked for extra work to do and even paid attention to what my favorite songs were, and would request them to be played during quiet work time. One day something changed. William pushed his desk to the back of the room and refused to work. When I walked back to check on him, I saw the gang symbols he had drawn all over his desk and notebook. School procedure is to send a student to the office after signs of gang affiliation, and so I did. For the rest of the semester after he returned to the classroom, William disrupted class by talking across the room to another game member and by laughing loudly with him at secret signs they made to each other. He also refused to do his work in class. He kept his grade up and passed with an A by coming in after school to do work, but it was still devastating to see a bright young man start down such a negative path.

This semester I have William again for Algebra 1 instead of pre-algebra, and I knew I would have to do something different. William lives with his aunt, and she and I now talk every week. She is very invested in William’s academic success, and is heart broken and furious about the gang situation. Now that I am in close contact with his auntie, William is once again motivated to do well in school. Just yesterday I overheard him bragging to other students because I had scolded him for getting a B in my class. He told them, “She got mad at me for getting a b because she thinks I can do better.”

Working on the reservation with my 98% native student population has been one of the biggest blessings in my life, and I know that it is making a difference in my students lives as well. A mother of one of my students cried during parent teacher conferences when she told me that her son came home and said to her, “Mom, I think I can do this.”

My First TFA Speech, May 24, 2012


Hi. My name is Lara H, I am from here in Rapid City, I graduated from South Dakota School of Mines and Technology, and I am 2011 Teach For America corps member. Growing up here in rapid I saw some strong inequities between Native American people and myself. While riding the bike path I often saw older native men sleeping under bridges, and I heard many racist jokes. This greatly disturbed me and I knew that I wanted to change things. I saw education as a means to create more opportunities as a solution.

When I first moved to Mission there were definitely some initial challenges! I saw many misbehaviors in my classroom that I soon learned could be attributed to my significant lack of confidence on the part of my students in their ability to do math. My classroom also had a variety of ability levels, from kids who could scarcely subtract to kids who were essentially ready to move on to the next grade. Attendance was another huge issue. At any given time about 1/3 of my class might be missing.

A specific student that I struggled with is William. When William first came to my class he was a lovely child who always wanted to work hard and please his elders. He is a boy just a little taller than me, with the sides of his head shaved and a long braid down the middle. He does horseback archery with his uncle, who is a security guard at the school. He is a fairly traditional young man. However, after the first few weeks of school, William changed. He began being disruptive in class and refused to do his work. A few days later I found out the explanation for these sudden changes. William had joined a gang.  

I realized that in order to overcome these challenges that I needed to set ambitious goals, not only for William, but for all my students. For my class I set a goal of 80% mastery for our class average at the end of the year, which is great level mastery. This is important for my students because for them it is the difference between life and death, prison and college, poverty and enough. For William, his auntie and I together decided that our goals for him were that he would have an A at any given time in my class, and that he would behave as a role model for other students.

Because these goals were so ambitious, I knew that I would have to increase my own investment and effort for the success of my students. I began differentiating my lessons in order to meet their varying levels of ability. I now stay after school every day in order to provide extra instructional time. And, in order to get kids to stay after school, I had to begin calling home to get parent’s permission. Soon enough families were inviting me to partake of their sacred inipis, go horseback riding, and join them for dinner. Becoming part of the community had a positive effect on my relationship with my students. They began to realize that I really am invested in them and this paid off in the classroom.



This year has been phenomenally rewarding and challenging. William now does his classwork and not only isn’t disruptive, but also keeps other kids in line. He doesn’t have an A yet, but I know he is invested because I handed out grade sheets yesterday and scolded him for getting a B. A few minutes later I overheard him telling his friends, “She got mad at me for getting a B because she thinks I can do better.” In class overall, I have seen my attendance rate increase and misbehaviors are significantly down. My kids no longer dread math class but are excitedly answering and asking questions. Our class average is currently only at 65%, but I have seen many individual students make years of growth, and I believe that we can still achieve our goal of 80% mastery by May.

Working on the reservation with my 98% native student population has been one of the biggest challenges and blessings of my life, and I know that it is making a difference in my students lives as well. A mother of one of my students cried during parent teacher conferences when she told me that her son came home and said to her, “Mom, I think I can do this.”

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

A letter from my sister back in hs, which she signed ~(heart) Rehohe

Beautiful Beloved~
You are so beautiful. I wish we could talk more, bt our schedules don't seem to allow it. I thought perhaps we could write letters. Plus, I'm bored right now, so I thought I would write to you...how does a love letter sound? I think that's the way we'll go then. Ehem (throat clearing)...

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Sugar is sweet
Unlike you

Haha...just kidding


My World

In my world there is but one heart,
I often think it's the most beautiful part.
Then I step back and observe for a while
Only to find I'm entranced in the smile.

With two piercing blue eyes that light up my sky
They lift me so high I feel I cold fly. Though it is small, less than six feet tall
My world will be there to break my fall.

With rosy red lips, so thin and slender,
The words that I hear sound ever so tender. 
Observe, if you will, cheeks pink as a flower
In April or May after a springtime shower.

We all need a world to keep as our own,
I got lucky, mine was raised in my home.
But now she is gone and no longer sleeps at my side,
In her I find refuge, in her I take pride.

My world is not place,
Nor is it an object in space.
My beautiful sister, with arms so strong,
With you as my world I cannot go wrong.

The End

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

...

I'm sitting here in class while my students take a test...I should be up walking around instead of blogging, but today, right now, I need this. I am feeling overwhelmed by the smallest of things. What is my deal? I am nervous that my students are going to fail this test. I thought that they were so well prepared, but now I'm not so sure. I don't like grading papers, and right now I can't imagine a job where I feel fulfilled. I want to do well so badly, to give these young people what they need to succeed, but I don't know how to help those who need help the most.

Also. I am happier being single now than I have ever been, and I don't consider myself a person who needs male companionship. However, I also am more comfortable now than I have ever been with the idea of loving someone. The idea feels more like an intimate trusting friendship, rather than a game.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Joy beyond compare, my eyes feel bright and my heart feels light, thank you Lord for revealing choice

Today is a day to be thankful. Today is a day to make others smile. Today is a day that will never come again, so I will love with all my loving capacity, I will laugh at what I can't control, and I will be myself no matter who is watching. Every little thing has a story, a reason it is the way it is. I can appreciate those stories and embrace the joy and the sadness or simply the existence of them. Every day, every moment is what I make of it. Being able to love is the best gift ever. I can love and I choose to love.