Moving Forward

I realize that as of late I have regressed emotionally to that of a high schooler. I am not ashamed; I think it is good every once in a while to lose yourself in emotion. However, I think I now need to start giving myself a little bit of direction and structure. I am allowing myself to be depressed and low energy and all of the bad things that come with that. Where is the light at the end of the tunnel? I feel like I need to change my circumstances-become a missionary in South America or something. But that is just my old tendencies to run away. Why do I think that would help? Wherever I go, I am still going to be there. My circumstances aren't what need to change, my perspective and my actions are what needs to change. I am focusing far too much on myself. What can I do to shed a little light in others' lives; what can I do to lighten someone else's load today? That is the only way that at the end of the day I will have felt worthwhile and like their was some kind of purpose to my existence this day. I need to be giving more than I am taking in this life, or else I am a drain and am helping to deteriorate the way things are rather than make things better. And then it would be better if I had never been born. What a waste and a shame that would be. I ought to start giving of myself.